Today is the first day of this new chapter of my life! I am embarking on this new path with conviction, serenity, maturity, regrets, hope and, most of all, joyful anticipation of what lies ahead. Finding the inner peace and willpower to surmount these next 7 days is somewhat coming naturally but, then again, I'm only a few hours in! lol... So far, so good! No cravings for Cheetos... I swear I am still trying to figure out if these things are laced with Prozac 'cause they have an instantaneous calming effect... For some reason, I now look at my current body as a science experiment gone wrong. I'm almost mentally detached from it already. It's such an odd feeling... hard to explain
I've also developed a healthy obsession towards the forum and message board on ObesityHelp.com. They have been such a source of inspiration, strength, and direction. Sometimes you just need to hear about other people facing the challenges you are facing who are also willing to lay it all out there, without fear of judgement. It is segmented by type of surgery because each surgery has its particularities.
I also started the gym yesterday, just cardio. It keeps my head clear and my mood right. These are 2 key elements in this journey as your brain, your head, and your depression will be fighting you every step of the way to grab that Cheetos, ice cream, cake, or big bowl of pasta... I am stressed beyond belief as well but am determined to manage it without comfort food. Oddly enough, 30 minutes on the elliptical machine with amazing music fueling my workout gives me the same feeling as what I'd get from comfort food... So, training my brain to re-route its pleasure center... Yikes! Wish me luck...
Not too sure how soon after the surgery I will be able to work out. However, I am so MORTIFIED about the excess skin that I will be motivated ASAP. I know it is a side effect of rapid weight loss. But I'd rather be skinny with extra skin than fat. Overall, I will do my very best to blog at least 4 times weekly in order to candidly and humbly share my story with those who may benefit from it. It is a personal journey that most may not understand but which is necessary to face head-on...
I've taken care of the fear about the surgery by consistently visualizing myself at the 6-month and 1-year marks! They say that the average loss is of about 75 to 100 lbs within the first 6 months... I won't believe it until I see it on myself... I'd be another person! OMG! Oh well, gotta go, but may post this evening to give a wrap-up of Day 1...
C ya!
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